This has been a wrenching and devastatingly difficult time for me. Unfortunately, it continues to be so; I don't expect it to change significantly for at least another month or two.
I titled the last post "Alone" because, with Sasha's death, I am all alone for the first time in exactly fifty years, since 1968. During that half-century, a few people have shared my life and living quarters -- but the one constant was that I always had at least one feline companion. For much of the last 25 years, I've had as many as three. But now, I am completely alone. It's an alien experience for me. I hate it. No, that's not strong enough: I absolutely loathe it. Without another living presence here, I barely feel half-alive myself. I'm also too ill and too poor to provide a home for another cat, at least to do so in a responsible manner.
Yet, I do desperately want another cat. For that to happen, I need to resuscitate myself. I also have to strengthen myself as much as possible because I have to move by the beginning of June of next year. The first step in my own revival will be to begin writing regularly again. If I'm able to do that, a few other miracles might be possible. I have many topics in mind; I know I'm alive primarily because a number of subjects and areas of inquiry continue to fascinate me.
I will have a new post up on or before Friday of this coming week. If I'm able to work faster, I will. Because of the damned calendar, I must pay the rent by Wednesday, along with the internet and phone bills, and a couple of other expenses. At the moment, I'm about $600.00 short of what I need. So, as always, I will be very deeply grateful for any help readers may be able to provide. I must add that I extend my profound thanks to all those who have made donations in the last few months. If not for you, I would have vanished by now. I'm sorry I haven't sent any thank you notes recently, but until the last couple of days, it's taken all my strength just to get out of bed. I'll be writing some thank you notes, too, in the coming week.
So, a month in advance of the New Year, I will start a new beginning of my own. I don't know if my new writing will be at all elegant or polished. But at least it will be new writing. And I think, based on my track record, that it will contain some original observations. I've been pretty consistent on that front. Speaking of which: has anyone else noticed that more and more people have begun writing and discussing the phenomenon of tribalism? I became aware of it more than a year ago. I wonder if my writing had anything to do with it. Some of my major pieces on tribalism were published -- wait for it -- almost ten years ago. Here's one important essay: "The Ravages of Tribalism: Learning to Hate 'The Other.'" (If you follow the links in that article, you'll find additional pieces on the subject.)
As you might expect, I have many additional thoughts about tribalism, gathered in the time that has passed. I also want to say a few things about what some others are saying about tribalism. It won't be in the nature of a spoiler to tell you that I often don't agree with the discussions I've come across. So tribalism gets added to my writing To Do list. That subject alone could keep me busy for another ten years.
But there are a lot of other issues and events to talk about. So I'll get busy on that, and I'll be back in the next four or five days (and maybe sooner). And if you have some spare change clanking around, it would be wonderful if you could throw it in this direction. I hardly expect to have a joyous holiday season, but it also doesn't have to be horrific beyond describing.
A multitude of thanks for being there, for listening, and for your consideration.