Pardon My Paroxysms of Laughter

I've written a great deal about the almost certain coming crisis with Iran; see, for example, the essays linked at the end of this post yesterday. I am well aware of how gravely serious this situation could rapidly become. In that regard, see "Morality, Humanity, and Civilization: 'Nothing remains...but memories'," in particular.

But you will have to forgive me for breaking into uncontrollable spasms of laughter as I read the opening of this story:

A second U.S. aircraft carrier strike group now steaming toward the Middle East is Washington's way of warning Iran to back down in its attempts to dominate the region, a top U.S. diplomat said here Tuesday.

Nicholas Burns, U.S. undersecretary of state for political affairs, ruled out direct negotiations with Iran and said a rapprochement between Washington and Tehran was "not possible" until Iran halts uranium enrichment.

"The Middle East isn't a region to be dominated by Iran. The Gulf isn't a body of water to be controlled by Iran. That's why we've seen the United States station two carrier battle groups in the region," Burns said in an address to the Dubai-based Gulf Research Center, an influential think-tank.

"Iran is going to have to understand that the United States will protect its interests if Iran seeks to confront us," Burns continued.

This is bracingly clear: Iran may not be permitted to "protect its interests" -- because we say so. Iran may not "protect its interests" even though it happens, you know, to be located there. And just which nation is it that has ceaselessly interfered in the Middle East since World War II, and which invaded and still occupies a Middle Eastern country that never threatened it?

But we are uniquely exempt from the standards that apply to all others. We can protect our interests wherever we declare them to be -- and we declare them to be around the entire globe.

And for the millionth time: Iran is fully entitled to pursue uranium enrichment under the terms of the Nuclear Nonproliferation Treaty -- to which it is a signatory. Israel, with the largest nuclear arsenal in the Middle East, is not a signatory to the NPT. Moreover, while we dictate to Iran (and everyone else) how they are to conduct themselves, we carve out exceptions for countries like India, and make any serious reduction of the immense danger represented by the spread of nuclear weapons impossible.

Don't think for a moment that all these problems are limited to the Bush administration. As my Dominion Over the World series discusses, the same basic foreign policy objective is shared by both political parties. That objective is very simple: global dominance, ensured by military supremacy. I noted yesterday that John Edwards echoes every single point of the Bush administration's arguments which may lead to a wider regional war in the Middle East. He is hardly alone among Democrats in such indefensible warmongering:

Iran with nuclear weapons is unacceptable, new House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer told The Jerusalem Post hours after entering the party leadership position.

The Maryland Democrat said the view is shared by his party, rejecting assertions that the Democrats would be weaker than the Republicans on Iran.

He also said that the use of force against Teheran remained an option.

...

Hoyer said the Democrats' position, like that of the Bush administration, was that preventing a nuclear-armed Iran had to be done through "discussions, negotiations, sanctions." Hoyer added that the US needed to work with the international community to block Teheran's nuclear ambitions.

At the same time, Hoyer said the use of force hadn't been taken off the table.

"I've not ruled that out," he said, but added, "It's not an option we want to consider until we know there is no other option."

Every prominent Democrat shares the views of Edwards and Hoyer. Our global hegemony is not to be threatened by anyone, anywhere, any time. There is absolutely no difference between the Democrats and Republicans on this fundamental issue.

And remember: if the Bush-Cheney gang doesn't bomb Iran, Hillary or another Democrat may well commit the fateful deed.

As always, It is my great pleasure to cheer you up, and raise your spirits. And despite all the dread signs, let us wish for peace in the New Year still just underway. Yet it must be noted that, in view of our current governing elites and their basic assumptions and worldview, peace doesn't have a chance in hell.