May 01, 2017

Among the Worst of Times

I'm sorry for the lack of writing over the last month. It's been a horrible time and, unfortunately, the horrible time continues. I'd forgotten how emotionally draining and time-consuming it is to take care of an ailing cat. (Of course, I remember in general all too well how exhausting and awful tending a dying cat is -- but once past the event, many of the specific details fade from memory. And I'd forgotten just how exhausting it is. Then, too, there are times when I collapse sobbing. Grief is profoundly tiring.) And then, with all my own rotten health problems on top of that, well ...

Sasha and I have a birthday this Friday, May 5. It's my actual birthday; Sasha's origins remain a mystery -- since I have no idea when she was born, when she came to live here I decided we'd share a birthday together. In recent weeks, I hadn't been at all sure we would both make it to the 5th this year -- I think now that we will, although I doubt the current situation can go on much longer after that.

God, that's all horribly depressing. It's what's happening here. I still desperately want to get back to writing. I'm forever making notes, and I try to do some actual writing every day. It's almost impossible at the moment to have the kind of sustained, uninterrupted time I need to get anywhere. Sasha needs something; I have to lie down for a while; sometimes Sasha and I need some cuddling time. I'll keep trying; hopefully, some day soon, I'll break through.

It's the first of the month again; once again, sad to say, I'm about $500 short of what I need for the first half of the month bills. And I should pay the rent by Friday of this week if it's not going to be late; if the rent were late, much unpleasantness would follow. I would be deeply grateful for any contributions readers care to make to our efforts to survive this very, very bad time.

I am actually sending out thank you notes. I'll get to everyone eventually; please be patient if you haven't received a note from me yet. These days, everything takes me far longer than I anticipate. Getting old and sick genuinely sucks. I recommend that you avoid it as long as possible.

As always, many thanks for reading -- and all my gratitude for your many kindnesses.